Coping with Pregnancy and Infant Loss: Finding Support and Healing in New York
There’s a silence that often follows pregnancy and infant loss—one that so many families carry quietly. You might find that people don’t know what to say, or worse, they say things that deepen the pain. The world seems to move on while you’re still standing in the space where your baby should be.
Grieving this kind of loss is deeply personal, and yet it’s one of the most misunderstood experiences there is.
Healing doesn’t mean “getting over it.”
It means being supported as you learn to carry both love and grief, side by side.
Therapy for pregnancy and infant loss at Evolving Through Grief Counseling Services in New York offers that compassionate space—somewhere to speak your baby’s name, release what you’ve been holding in, and begin to reconnect with yourself again.
Why October Is a Difficult Month for So Many Parents
October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month—a time dedicated to honoring lives that ended too soon and supporting the families who carry them in their hearts. For many, it’s a tender month filled with remembrance, love, and often, renewed grief.
Across the country, families gather for candlelight vigils, remembrance walks, and community events to break the silence and offer solidarity. In New York, October often brings “Wave of Light” gatherings—moments where families light candles at 7 p.m. to symbolize that no child’s life is forgotten.
Awareness Month exists to remind every grieving parent that their baby’s life mattered. No matter how brief or unseen that life was, it deserves to be remembered—and so do you.
Why Pregnancy and Infant Loss Feels So Isolating
The Invisible Nature of This Grief:
Pregnancy and infant loss are often hidden losses. There may be no photos, no public rituals, and few people who understand how profoundly your life has changed. That invisibility can make it hard for others to grasp the depth of your pain—and easy for them to unintentionally minimize it.
Research shows that emotional distress following miscarriage and stillbirth is often underestimated by both loved ones and healthcare providers. A review in Frontiers in Psychology found that many parents feel “dismissed or unsupported,” which only compounds loneliness and shame (Frontiers in Psychology, 2021).
Your grief is valid—even if others can’t see it or don’t know how to hold it.
When Support Feels Hard to Find:
Even the most caring people sometimes say things that minimize your loss:
“You can try again.”
“At least it happened early.”
“Everything happens for a reason.”
These words often come from discomfort, not cruelty—but they can still deepen the isolation.
Research published by the National Institutes of Health shows that social support after pregnancy loss is inconsistent, and many grieving parents experience distress long after others assume they’ve “moved on” (BMC Women’s Health, 2021).
When support feels scarce, therapy becomes the space where your pain is not only heard but honored—where your baby’s life and your grief are acknowledged with the tenderness they deserve.
What Healing Really Looks Like After Loss
Allowing Yourself to Feel Every Emotion:
Pregnancy loss grief doesn’t follow a timeline. It’s not linear, and it doesn’t obey expectations. You might feel sadness one moment and anger the next. You may notice guilt or jealousy when you see others expecting or holding their babies. These emotions can be painful—but they’re also a reflection of your love.
A 2020 study in The American Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology found that nearly 30% of individuals who experience early pregnancy loss meet criteria for post-traumatic stress within the first month (PubMed, 2020).
Grief this profound deserves space, not suppression.
Allowing yourself to feel what arises—without judgment or hurry—is not weakness. It’s an act of self-compassion.
Reconnecting with Your Body and Identity:
Loss can change how you relate to your body and your sense of self. You might feel disconnected, distrustful, or even betrayed by your body. It’s common to struggle with intimacy, physical touch, or identifying as a parent after loss.
Avoiding these feelings can make healing harder. Research from The Journal of Women’s Health found that unresolved grief after miscarriage is linked to long-term emotional distress and anxiety related to the body (Journal of Women’s Health, 2023).
In therapy at ETGCS, I hold space for you to grieve through the body, release stored pain, and slowly begin to reconnect with your sense of identity and trust. Your body deserves compassion—it carried both love and loss.
How Therapy Supports You Through the Grieving Process
Talking About the Unspoken
Pregnancy and infant loss often bring emotions that are hard to voice—shame, guilt, anger, fear, or confusion. Therapy allows these emotions to be expressed in a space where nothing has to be hidden.
Grief-informed therapy at Evolving Through Grief Counseling Services helps you process both the emotional and physical aspects of loss, giving shape to what often feels unspeakable. Research shows that early psychological support after miscarriage or stillbirth can significantly reduce symptoms of anxiety, depression, and trauma. https://bmjopen.bmj.com/content/6/11/e011864?utm_source=chatgpt.com
Therapy with me does not rush you—I walk beside you, helping you hold your grief and your life in the same gentle breath.
Rebuilding Hope and Meaning Over Time
Healing doesn’t mean erasing your loss. It means learning to live with it in a way that honors your baby’s life.
Through grief counseling in New York, I help clients rediscover meaning—not in “moving on,” but in moving with love. Over time, hope becomes quieter but deeper:
The ability to find small moments of peace.
The capacity to remember with warmth instead of only pain.
The courage to imagine a future that can hold both grief and joy.
My role is to help you integrate your loss into your story—not as an ending, but as part of your becoming.
Finding a Therapist in New York Who Understands Pregnancy and Infant Loss
What to Expect from Supportive Grief Therapy
At Evolving Through Grief Counseling Services, I specialize in supporting individuals and couples navigating pregnancy and infant loss. My approach is trauma-informed, compassionate, and rooted in the belief that your grief is sacred and deserving of time, tenderness, and truth.
In therapy, you can expect:
A space that honors your baby’s life and your unique grief process.
Guidance for navigating complex emotions—guilt, fear, anger, or numbness.
Support for reconnecting with your body and rebuilding trust in yourself.
Tools to help you communicate and stay connected with your partner through shared grief.
Therapy gives you room to be fully human—to weep, remember, question, and heal at your own pace.
You Don’t Have to Go Through This Alone
You don’t have to carry this pain in silence. Whether your loss was recent or years ago, your story matters. There’s room for your sorrow, your love, and your healing.
If you’re coping with pregnancy or infant loss, as a grief therapist in New York, I offer compassionate, specialized support for every step of your journey.
💛 Schedule counseling in New York to begin your process of gentle healing, remembrance, and reconnection.
About Lindsay Fernandez
I’m a Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Certified Grief Educator, recently published Author and I’ve dedicated my life to transforming our society's understanding of grief, loss, and pivotal change. My journey into grief counseling is deeply personal, shaped by my experiences of growing up with a mother who struggled with physical and mental illness, and the profound loss I experienced when she unexpectedly passed in 2011.
Because change, loss, and evolution touch every corner of life, my approach is holistic and uniquely personalized to you. I help my clients understand their unique grief journey, explore their emotions and relationships, and develop tailored coping strategies. I’m passionate about grief education and therapy, believing that when we understand our own life experiences, we can more easily release the shame and judgment often associated with the many forms of loss and change.
I welcome you to read more about myself and my background at https://www.etgcs.com/about
I look forward to supporting your through this chapter.
